PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
it's like heaven, but drunker
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Randomize
