I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
