i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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