So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
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