Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
