New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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