Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
