So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
