Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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