I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Randomize
