would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
