Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Randomize
