If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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