I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
This house was built for laser tag.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
