you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
