You work out of a Hotel?
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
