Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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