I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
