I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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