And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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