As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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