If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
