My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize