Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize