i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
