just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
