This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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