are you still at the devil's house?
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
