When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize