Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize