If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
You are a genius and a whore.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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