there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
