My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
