i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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