i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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