Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
wat bout pragnant strippers??
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
