That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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