There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
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