I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Randomize
