If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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