if you like me you must not know who I am
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
