I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
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