Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
