I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
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