Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
