i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
