we're blogging at a bar
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
