Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
