It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
