Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I'm both gender and math confused
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
