If i come over, it means nothing
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Fuck me I smell like cheese
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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