Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
the day after is always just damage control
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Randomize