Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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